I got a blue and red Adidas bag and a humongous binder
I'm tryin' my best not to look like a minor niner
Went out for the football team to prove that I'm a man
I guess I shouldn't tell them that I like Duran Duran
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine (this is me in grade nine)
This is me in grade nine, baby, this is me in grade nine
If I had a million dollars (and if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a house (well, I would buy you a house)
And if I had a million dollars (and if I had a million dollars)
Buy you furniture for your house (maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman)
And if I had a million dollars (and if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a K-Car (a nice Reliant automobile)
And if I had a million dollars, I'd buy your love
If I had a million dollars, I'd build a tree fort in our yard
And if I had a million dollars, you could help, it wouldn't be that hard
And if I had a million dollars, maybe we could put, like a little tiny fridge in there, somewhere
- Little tiny fridge, and maybe I could direct that old lady up there... oh... oh, the Brian Street Theater... it's right up that ladder, lady! Welcome to the Brian Street Theater! Have a Fruit Roll-Up! Aren't you gonna eat it? Oh, for Christ's sake!
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you a fur coat (but not a real fur coat, that's cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you an exotic pet (yep, like a llama or an emu)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
Well, I'd buy you John Davidson's remains (oooh, all them grid and grey and hair mmmm... remoins, remains)
If I had a million dollars, I'd buy your love
If I had a million dollars, we wouldn't have to walk to the store
And if I had a million dollars, we'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more
If I had a million dollars, we wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
- But we would...
If I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a green dress (but not a real green dress, that's cruel)
And if I had a million dollars (ssssh... if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you some art (a Picasso or a Garfunkel)
And if I had a million dollars (if I had a million dollars)
I'd buy you a monkey (haven't you always wanted a monkey?)
And if I had a million dollars, I'd buy your love
If I had a million dollars, If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, If I had a million dollars
If I had a million dollars, I'd be rich
- Thank you very much!
- Thank you...
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